Aging mothers' and their adult daughters' perceptions of conflict behaviors

Aging parents tend to perceive greater compatibility between themselves and offspring than do offspring, but there is little research examining differences in perceptions of conflicts. Ninety-six older mothers (M age = 76) and their daughters (M age = 44) together selected a conflictual incident, then individually rated the degree to which they and the other person had engaged in destructive, constructive, or avoidant conflict behaviors. Mothers and daughters reported using constructive approaches more than other approaches. Mothers claimed to engage in constructive behaviors more than daughters recognized. Daughters reported engaging in destructive and avoidant behaviors more than mothers realized. Mothers also thought daughters felt better about the incident than daughters reported feeling about it. Findings suggest older mothers' underestimate daughters' negative behaviors and feelings in conflict situations.