Feelings and experiences of midwives who do not have children about caring for childbearing women

Objectives: to gain insight into the feelings and experiences of midwives who do not have children of the effects of a negative response to the question, 'Have you got children?', on the midwife's perception of herself in the midwife/mother relationship and to formulate strategies which promote successful midwife/mother relationships. Design: survey using a questionnaire. Participants: 184 midwives who did not have children throughout the UK who were recruited via an advertisement in a national midwifery journal. Findings: as in the general population, some midwives do not want children at the moment, some do not want then at all, and some want children but are unable to have them. Some found the question,'Have you got children?: legitimate and conversational; others found it annoying, implying a deficit in either themselves as women, or as midwives. They considered their response a key factor in maintaining good relationships with women, assuring them of compassionate care despite lack of personal experience. Key conclusions and implications for practice: respondents clearly identified the need for thought about how they would respond to the question 'Have you got children?' in a way which left them and their clients feelings comfortable. This could be incorporated into initial programmes of midwifery and revisited thereafter, to help students and midwives explore aspects of their own fertility. Midwives who experience pregnancy loss, or the loss of potential motherhood through age or medical reasons, need specific support as they go through a grieving process. Helpful interventions include counselling outside the workplace, and sensitive clinical placements, avoiding those areas which lead to constant contact with babies. (C) 2000 Harcourt Publishers Ltd.